beloved cat, poems, poetry, prose, steven humphreys
Pets

The Flip Side

Our oldest cat is dying

it has been a slow hard time

I am devastated

watching him sink

into death’s clutches

he’s in no apparent pain

just extremely lacking in energy

so tired and limp

and old

I think about seventeen or eighteen years old now

I love him boundlessly

and feel so helpless I could cry

out loud but I am crying inside

down to my very soul

he used to be so fluffy and beautiful

but now he has become decrepit

there’s nothing we can do

he’s become virtually long black hair and bones

he has no appetite and drinks little water

it’s like he’s shutting down

we made up his own room to keep the

other animals away from him

he’s so fragile now

sleeping and resting in his own room

up against the door crying for us

we go in often and spend our time

with him

poor kitty

we love him so

we feel so helpless

I remember we saved his life

and prolonged it because we changed

his food three years ago, which had saved his life

he may not make it

through the night

he cannot walk without falling down

he can hardly hold his head up

he’s always been so sweet

and loving

and big and strong

this is no way to go

there is no dignity in dying

the world was made this way

I didn’t make this world

it falls upon God who did it

so I live with a hole in my heart

that will never heal.

and, I will always love him.

and, the pain is so terrible

I cannot bear it.

I can hardly talk about it

but I don’t know maybe it

helps me cope in my pain

writing about it here

I have prayed long for him.

and, I ask God, why does all this

death and dying of the sweet

and innocent here on earth

need to be?

why not let the beautiful

and the innocent live forever

in love

and kill off everything on the face

of this earth that is evil?

these are my questions to

God.

the flip side

of living and happiness

is unbearably painful.

and, this is exactly where I am now.

in the flip side of life.

one of my little boys.

I wish I’d die for him,

but my wife and my

other animals need me

around.

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