before here

before here poem by steven james humphreys

before here

when I was not alive

I had a real mother and a real father

who loved me

I had a real family

and it was up there

I always had the feeling I was never of this earth

and didn’t quite fit in it

still feel that way

even though I did want to ‘belong’

in my younger days

now I don’t really want to ‘fit’ in…

I mean, I don’t necessarily want to be

thought of as a ‘weirdo’

yet, not fitting in the scheme of things is part of who I am

it seeped into my soul or being level more as a fairly recent thing

not that it’s too late to join the club and conform

or am too old doing so

it is more like I feel

I have graduated and

have something to say

to those who are





I guess I am

becoming more

of how I should

have always been.




like pages

in chapters

of a book

and I’m

nearly done

reading that




its last



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